Talking GPS Teddy Bear Gives Directions, a Lifetime of Nightmares

Posted: Jun. 11, 2008 10:06 a.m.

If you're like us, the voice on your portable GPS navigation unit may strike you as a bit cold.  Impersonal.  Sure, it gets you to unfamiliar destinations with ease, and it even enunciates well, but you don't get the feeling that it cares much about you.  You can decide to call her "Karen" and imagine that she's giving you directions as a part-time gig while working her way through nursing school, but still, the disembodied voice just isn't the sort of warm, fuzzy thing you'd like to curl up with hiding under the blankets on a cold...

Well, you get our point.

Salvation is here.  Japanese robotics firm iXs Research Corporation saw this same problem, and they've developed just what you've always wanted -- a cute, cuddly talking teddy bear that sits on your dashboard and gives you directions

No, we're not kidding.

Motor Trend explains, "The teddy bear...has six joints in his arms and neck he uses to motion while giving directions."  Geek.com adds, "If you'd like to get more information about local landmarks the bear will provide that as well. All you need to do is rub its head."  (This sounds safe...drive with one hand, rub Teddy's head to get tidbits of local culture with the other). CrunchGear has more: "Besides being able to navigate the driver through Japanese traffic, the bear is able to comment on his or her driving style. Sudden stops, for example, will result in reactions such as 'Be careful, please!'"

This is getting creepy.  The bear knows too much.

GearLive adds, "The teddy also has an alcohol detection sensor in its neck and will admonish you if it smells that last margarita with 'You haven't been drinking, have you?'"

By which time you've concluded that you've had one too many...you're seeing talking teddy bears.

We're all for anything that might get another drunk driver off the road.  But frankly, the idea of this thing is starting to give us nightmares.  We'll stick with Karen.  She's a single mom, you see, and needs the job to cover day care for her son so she can finish school...

Considering a portable nav unit? Read our nav system buying tips before you invest.  We considered them all carefully.  But we promise, we didn't cuddle with any of them.

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